The following was sent to me by my friend Sunny.
The morning rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:00 am. The evening rush hour is
from 3:00 to 7:00 PM.
Friday’s rush hour starts Thursday morning.
Gravois Road can only be pronounced by a native.
Construction on highway 40, 70, 270, 44, 55 and I-170 is a way of life, and
a permanent form of entertainment.
A St. Louisan from South County has never been to North County and visa
versa.
West County has everything delivered.
If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is probably a factory
defect, or it has been on for the last 17 miles.
There are 2 exits on Highway 40 for Clayton Road and 2 for Big Bend.
All old ladies with blue hair in Cadillacs (driving on Olive west of 270)
have the right of way.
Laclede Station Road mysteriously changes names as you cross intersections.
As do McCausland, Lindbergh, Watson, Fee Fee, Airport Road and Midland.
Drivers are starting to cut their OWN plates rather than go through the Mo.
Vehicle Dept. to get new tags. You can purchase tags from dealers behind
QuiK Shops in the city. They are cheaper, the clerks are nicer, and the
service is faster.
You can go all four directions on highway 270: North and South in West
County, East and West in South County, and East and West in North County.
Confused? So are the St. Louis drivers.
No native St. Louisan knows that Lindburgh runs from South County to North
County. And, if you tell them, they will not believe you. Lindbergh belongs
to every neighborhood except Kirkwood, who had the nerve to creatively
change the name to “Kirkwood Road”.
Never stare at the driver of the car with the bumper sticker that says,”Keep
honking, I’m reloading”- he is.
Any car parked longer than 4 hours in the city, is considered a parts store.
Highway 270 is our daily version of the NASCAR circuit.
YIELD signs are for decoration only. No native St. Louisan will ever grasp
the concept.
If it snows or rains? Stay home
